The Shanghai-Puppeteers

Have I mentioned how I am absolutely convinced that Shanghai has been invaded by aliens?

Allow me to explain...

Upon arriving in this city, I have noticed several things. One of which could be how, every week, for one day, for about 5 hours, every ten minutes fighter jets fly over the city (was that time span confusing enough? )…trying to be sneaky are ya’?

Besides the random angry jets, what about all your “trying to look like normal buildings but really they are just alien space ship” buildings? Eh?

Take this building for example:

I saw this sucker in People’s Square. Sure, during the day it looks all innocent and half-sphere-like…but at night? WHY DO YOU LIGHT UP LIKE THAT. Sure, you claim it is for show, and all the buildings light up at night because it attracts people, and people spend money, and it boosts the economy…don’t give me that impeccable logic! I know what is really going on. Obviously your alien counterparts only come out at night, and they like the pretty lights. The pretty lights make them feel at home in their little space shuttle in the sky.

What about this building:

Do you really need two saucer-like buildings in the city? Really? I think not. I think you couldn’t come up with a more creative way to hide your aliens’ strange desires to live in circular places (like humanity’s need to put ourselves in boxes of varying sizes…) so you just decided to build another alien-palace. I see. I get it. No worries.

And of course there is the all-powerful, all-knowing building I have thus dubbed The Claw.

You can tell me all you like that it is a five star Marriott hotel that hosts only the richest and most famous people in the world, but I know the truth. I know that the only reason there is a GIANT ORB inside the claw-like structure is because that is the power source for all your little alien activities. Don’t lie to me and tell me you didn’t plan that shape, and the weird way the building looks like it can detach from its base and shoot off into the sky. And yes, when it is thundering and storming outside, I do see how the lightening hits the claw and is attracted directly into the orb. I saw that. Don’t think I didn’t. You can’t fool me.

And then we have this “Pearl Tower”

…could you be any more obvious? I decided I needed a little visit inside this beast of a building just to make sure you aliens are not chillin’ inside laughing maniacally over the fast-paced, ever-growing city of Shanghai, doing your evil bidding while watching the money stack up. But when I was inside, I was keenly aware how I, and everyone else, was under your spell. Don’t ask me why humans get dumb at insanely high heights and all we want to do is stare, eyes glazed, out of windows at the sheer vastness of this thing we call “earth”.



I walked around the viewing deck, went outside to the part where you stand on glass (you want to know what is fun? Jumping up and down on that part...hehehe)

…and then was perfectly content with life and found myself at the bottom of the tower, exiting the grounds…How did you do it, aliens? How did you brainwash me into forgetting my mission, getting all giddy and childlike and staring out at all the craziness that is called “Shanghai”. I’ll never know.

Touché, dear Shanghai-Puppeteers.